More from the Horror Grab Bag

Here’s another batch of horror movies I’ve watched on streaming Netflix.

The Hole (2009) – Rated PG-13

“In the basement of their new home, young brothers Dane and Lucas discover a mysterious trap door. With their neighbor, Julie, the boys pry open the ominous barrier and find a bottomless hole, which leads them to excruciating pain and misery.”

I feel a little ashamed to put this on the same page with the other three movies. The Hole was delayed several years and never received a U.S. theatrical release. This is a shame because it is a lot of fun. It is a mixture of adventure and horror with a young cast, kind of an 80s throwback. Bruce Dern puts in his usual quirky performance but the movie belongs to the three young unknown leads (Chris Massoglia, Haley Bennett, and Nathan Gamble). Joe Dante gets great performances from them and does a nice balancing act between the adventure and horror elements (just as he did in Gremlins).

Monster Brawl (2011) – Not rated

“This bone-rattling showdown staged as a pay-per-view event brings together some of filmdom’s most hideous creatures in a fight to the last freak. Among the horrifying combatants in the bloody competition are Cyclops, Frankenstein and Swamp Gut.”

Okay, I admit that from the description this already sounds like a stinker but I wanted to give it a chance. The only good thing I can say about it is that it is better than FDR: American Badass. I still wasn’t able to watch more than fifteen minutes of this.

Night of the Living Dead: Reanimation (2012) – Rated R

“After inheriting a funeral home, a mortician accidentally exposes hundreds of uncremated bodies to toxic waste, causing them to rise from the dead. When the man’s inheritance-seeking brother shows up, the two must fight off a full zombie outbreak!”

This was at least watchable so it fares better than Monster Brawl and FDR. That said, watchable is the best praise I can give it. Only for those who need a zombie fix and have watched everything else available, even Jeffrey Combs couldn’t save this. The acting, direction, and script are terrible.

FDR: American Badass (2012) – Rated R

“After contracting polio from a werewolf bite, FDR won’t stop at single-handedly ending the Great Depression and prohibition. With the help of a team of historic figures, he must claim victory in World War II by defeating an army of Nazi werewolves.”

While this sounds like it could be a lot of fun, it was actually truly awful. I couldn’t even manage to give it the full fifteen minute tryout.