American Psycho 2 – Second Verse Same as the First week

This week I have decided to cover the unjustly derided vehicle known as the sequel. This is Second Verse Same as the First week. American Psycho 2 is currently available on instant Netflix.

PASS: American Psycho 2 (2002) – Rated R for violence and language.

“Patrick Bateman is dead, but his evil legacy continues with Rachael Newman (Mila Kunis), the only victim who managed to escape Batemans grasp. Rachael will get rid of anyone who threatens her chances of becoming teaching assistant to the infamous Dr. Daniels, a professor and former FBI profiler. In a world where the stakes are higher and sex can kill, terror lurks in the new American Psycho.”

“This girl has no concept of reality.”

Okay this week we have covered sequels that do not suck and some that surpass their originals. Now we have one that I like to call a SINO – sequel in name only.

American Psycho was an absolutely brilliant satire. While the book by Bret Easton Ellis did make for good satire, most of the laurels deserve to be thrown at the feet of writer/director Mary Harron who did a brilliant job of punching up the material and directing an incredible performance by Christian Bale.

American Psycho 2 begins with a teenage Rachael killing off Patrick Bateman in a scene that is remarkable only for its cheesiness. This opening scene does not bode well for the picture.

American Psycho 2 also errs by being a bit too obvious. Our second victim, a bureaucratic ninny is beaten to death with her prominently displayed employee of the year award. To facilitate the “American” portion of American Psycho, Mila Kunis wears a red, white and blue All-American Girl shirt.

The funny thing about American Psycho 2 is that, apart from the brief opening scene and a later reprise, it does not feature any of the characters from American Psycho. It also does not fit tonally or thematically with the first film.

American Psycho 2 would actually have been much better if you cut the first scene altogether and renamed the film something like Killer T.A. It is basically a B Bad Girl movie a la Poison Ivy / Wild Things / etc.

Basically if you can completely ignore the American Psycho connection then this film can be a fun guilty pleasure. If you cannot do that then you will not enjoy the film. Also this film is played as a comedy instead of a satire.

Mila Kunis is likable but certainly no Christian Bale. William Shatner is not actually in that much of the movie and does not have much to do except flirt with Lindy Booth. Lindy is wonderful but does not have much of a part. After seeing her performances in Dawn of the Dead and Cry Wolf, I would have preferred seeing her as the psycho.

I rate this as a pass but it can certainly be enjoyable in the right mood. As a sequel to American Psycho though, it is terrible.

People Watch: Robin Dunne who plays Brian here can currently be seen as Dr. Zimmerman on Sanctuary.

Star Trek II – Second Verse Same as the First week

This week I have decided to cover the unjustly derided vehicle known as the sequel. This is Second Verse Same as the First week. Star Trek II – The Wrath of Khan is currently available on instant Netflix.

WATCH: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982) – Rated PG

“To escape his desk job, Adm. James T. Kirk (William Shatner) returns to the USS Enterprise, assisting Spock (Leonard Nimoy) in a training mission for Starfleet cadets. But the inexperienced crew is put to the test when escaped villain Khan (Ricardo Montalban) steals a powerful weapon and comes after the admiral seeking revenge. Now, Kirk must use all his wiles and whip the cadets into shape if they hope to defeat Khans deadly traps.”

Galloping around the cosmos is a game for the young, Doctor

Some sequels are better than the original film. Star Trek II is a rare sequel in that it is good where the original was not. The only two things to recommend the original Star Trek the Motion Picture are that it got made, thus bringing back Star Trek as a franchise and the couple minute Klingon sequence which is actually pretty good.

Thankfully director Nicholas Meyer jettisoned the baggage of the first film and went back to the fun of the original series. Say goodbye to the dry as toast utilitarian science fiction of Star Trek The Motion Picture and say hello to the sci-fi fun of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.

After proving that he could take established properties (Sherlock Holmes, Jack the Ripper) and rewrite them in wonderful interesting ways (The Seven Percent Solution, Time After Time), Nicholas Meyer was given the reins to Star Trek. Here he essentially did the same thing that J.J. Abrams would do in the Star Trek reboot – take fan-favorite ingredients (original cast, The Enterprise, etc.) and direct something entertaining for all.

In spite of having a large number of people writing it (Harve Bennett, Jack B. Sowards, Samuel A. Peeples, and Nicholas Meyer), the script does not feel overburdened or erratic. The idea is brilliant – go back to a previous episode and extrapolate. Unfortunately this led to the first few seasons of Next Generation copying classic Trek episodes instead of establishing its own identity. On the flip-flipside it also led to a wonderful Deep Space 9 episode where they go back in time to The Trouble with Tribbles.

Most of the original cast are back on board. Only Majel Barrett as Nurse Chapel and Grace Lee Whitney as Yeoman Janice Rand seem to be missing here.

The flamboyance of Shatner as Kirk is not only fun but integral to match the flamboyance of Ricardo Montalban in his role as Khan. Spock (Leonard Nimoy) and Bones (DeForest Kelley) bicker and represent intellect/reason and emotion/humanity respectively as always.

James Doohan, Nichelle Nichols, and George Takei all do a great job of reprising their roles as Scotty, Uhura, and Sulu. I am singling out Chekov (Walter Koenig) because even though he recognizes Khan and the Botany Bay in the movie, he actually was not in that episode of the series. Back in the day, Starlog had a humorous cartoon showing Chekov and Khan meeting in an Enterprise restroom to explain the omission.

The non-Trek cast vary wildly in ability. Ricardo Montalban is divine as the vengeance fueled Khan and naturally represents the top of the scale. Paul Winfield adds a touch of class as Captain Terrell. At the bottom is Merritt Butrick as Dr. David Marcus, who is just awful and shrill. In between we have Kirstie Alley as Saavik and Bibi Besch as Dr. Carol Marcus.

As with most Star Treks, there are quite a few nits to pick. The USS Reliant has to send down a party to search for life on Ceti Alpha V/VI. Who do they send? Security – nope. Scientist of any kind – nope. They send down the Captain and the First Officer with no escort.

On a hilariously personal note, Spock allows Saavik to take the Enterprise out of space dock for the first time. As I watch this, my youngest has just passed her Drivers License exam and I gave her the keys to drive on her own for the first time.

Nicholas Meyer keeps the action moving and stages a couple of really good starship battles. Shatner overacts but not too badly, Montalban overacts a ton but is a complete hoot, everyone else is along for the ride. This is arguably the best of the Star Trek movies – the only one I think comes close is the Star Trek reboot.

Side note: A bunch of the Star Trek movies are about the Next Generation crew and they all have big budgets. Why then are none of them even remotely as good as the 2-part Borg TV episode or even the 2-part Klingon episode?

I heartily recommend Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Plus the transfer looks gorgeous – better than I have ever seen this movie at home.

Netflix presents this movie in beautiful HD assuming you have a good internet connection.

People Watch: Composer James Horner has a cameo as an Enterprise crewmember. Dance Fever host Deney Terrio also has a cameo as one of the henchmen of Khan.

Terminator 2 – Second Verse Same as the First week

This week I have decided to cover the unjustly derided vehicle known as the sequel. This is Second Verse Same as the First week. Terminator 2 – Judgment Day is currently available on instant Netflix.

WATCH: Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) – Rated R for strong sci-fi (not Syfy) action and violence and for language.

“In this sequel, director James Cameron delivers scene after scene of action-packed thrills. A bigger, better Terminator (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is gunning for a shape-shifting T-1000 who is out to kill John Connor (Edward Furlong), the son of Sarah (Linda Hamilton), the original Terminators nemesis”

As with Alien/Aliens, Terminator is a better film than Terminator 2 but Terminator 2 is the more enjoyable film. Cameron is a master of wonderful cuts. In the opening he segues from children playing on a playground to a rather stark vision of the future.

As he did with Aliens, Cameron has also interwoven a theme here. In T2, the overall theme is an examination of what it means to be human. This is more pronounced in the extended version which I was surprised to discover this was. This version contains a scene with Sarah talking to Kyle Reese (Michael Biehn), an extra scene with Arnie being worked on, an extra scene with workaholic Miles Dyson, and others.

Cameron loves to have strong female protagonists in his films. This is one of the things I love about Cameron as the action film genre often has a “Men Only” sign on it. Here Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton) is very buff and capable if somewhat psychologically screwed up. Linda Hamilton does a fine job of grounding many fantastic sequences.

Besides his genius at pacing that I mentioned yesterday, Cameron also excels at injecting appropriate humor into deadly, often grim, encounters. I say “appropriate” because the humor is funny without detracting from the seriousness of the situation.

The opening action sequence where Arnie acquires clothing has great action and humor. Unfortunately if you stop to consider it, the scene makes no sense. For an example of what The Terminator series looks like without humor, watch Terminator Salvation.

Arnold returns as a different T-800 and all jokes aside about his robotic delivery, he makes an excellent Terminator. In the first film he was the ultimate Terminator but here he is practically obsolete next to the new T-1000 model.

Robert Patrick plays the new liquid metal Terminator and the smoothness of his face really lends credibility to the changes. Of course a large part of the new Terminator are the special effects used. It seems with every film, Cameron graphically pushes the envelope of what can be accomplished.

Edward Furlong plays John Connor, future leader of the human race. Unfortunately John Connor at this stage is just a juvenile delinquent. Furlong is pretty good but it is often difficult to see where his leadership qualities will spring from.

Joe Morton has a small but meaty role as Miles Dyson, whose discoveries lead to Skynet and ultimately armageddon.

It can be no surprise that I wholeheartedly recommend one of the greatest action films of all time. The special effects hold up quite well.

Netflix presents T2 in high-definition for those of you with adequate internet connections. The picture is better than DVD quality but a bit shy of the Blu-Ray.

People Watch: Xander Berkeley (Mason in 24) and Jenette Goldstein (Vasquez in Aliens) have brief roles here as foster parents to John Connor.

Aliens – Second Verse Same as the First week

This week I have decided to cover the unjustly derided vehicle known as the sequel. This is Second Verse Same as the First week. Aliens is currently available on instant Netflix.

WATCH: Aliens (1986) – Rated R.

“In this acclaimed sequel, the only survivor from the first film, Lt. Ripley (Sigourney Weaver), finds her horrific account of her crews fate is met with skepticism — until the disappearance of colonists on LV-426 prompts a team of high-tech Marines to investigate. This special edition features an introduction by director James Cameron, commentary by cast and crew members and both the theatrical and special edition versions of the film.”

“Game over man, game over.”

Please note that the description refers to the disc version. The instant version is the theatrical release.

Alien and Aliens are two of my all-time favorite films. While Alien is the better film (by just a smidge), it takes a long time to set up the story and mythos and even once the action starts, the movie moves in fits and spurts. Aliens with its extreme emphasis on action is the more enjoyable film.

James Cameron is an incredible director. He made three of the best action films ever made (Aliens, Terminator, and Terminator 2) as well as the blockbusters Titanic and Avatar. Every thing he touches since Piranha 2: The Spawning is apparently made of gold.

Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) completes her transformation here from Alien. Besides being the main character of a wonderful ensemble, she is also central to the theme woven throughout the film. Cameron visits and revisits aspects of motherhood throughout the production (more so in the extended version). There is a wonderful initial scene of the face of a sleeping Ripley that fades into a scene of the planet Earth.

Comedian Paul Reiser plays wonderfully against type as friendly corporate representative Burke. Genre veteran Lance Henriksen is genuinely creepy as Bishop. This is the only film child actor Carrie Henn appeared in and she is quite good (she is a schoolteacher now).

The soldiers are all great. The underrated Bill Paxton has a field day as the panicky Hicks. Michael Biehn is the quiet but ultra-competent Hudson. Jenette Goldstein steals many a scene as the uber macho Vasquez. Even William Hope is good as the hapless Lt. Gorman.

While all of the film is impressive, I think the thing Cameron does best is that he knows how to properly pace the film. After a lot of buildup (and a couple false scares to keep us interested), Cameron brings us to the best action setpiece in the movie. It is an incredibly tense confrontation between the marines and the Aliens.

The important part is that right after that is over, there are a few character beats so we can catch our breath before the next action sequence. After the following sequence, we get some very humorous dialogue especially from Hudson and then more buildup as the survivors prepare for a siege.

It is hard to believe that Cameron only had a half-dozen alien suits to work with. It seems as though there are a never-ending swarm of aliens, particularly in a sequence involving the auto sentries in the extended edition.

Well it can hardly be a surprise that I heartily recommend one of my favorite films of all time. While Cameron does spend some time setting up the story, it is like the long climb of a roller coaster before you go over the top. Once you hit the peak, the ride is utterly thrilling all the way to the end.

Thankfully Netflix presents this movie in HD. While not without flaws, the 720p image looks so much better than my DVD. This has me eagerly awaiting the 1080p Alien Blu-Ray box set due this fall.

Trivia: Kathryn Bigelow, first female to win a Best Director Oscar for The Hurt Locker, directed Near Dark. Near Dark features Lance Henriksen (Bishop), Bill Paxton (Hudson), and Jenette Goldstein (Vasquez) from Aliens as vampires and in one scene, the movie Aliens is playing in the background. It is an interesting film – just ignore the ridiculous new cover they gave it to make it look like Twilight.

People Watch: Mark Rolston, who plays Drake here, played Dan Erickson in Saw V and Saw VI.

Die Hard 2 – Second Verse Same as the First week

This week I have decided to cover the unjustly derided vehicle known as the sequel. This is Second Verse Same as the First week. Die Hard 2 – Die Harder is currently available on instant Netflix.

WATCH: Die Hard 2 (1990) – Rated R for adult content.

“Bruce Willis reprises his role as John McClane, an off-duty cop gripped with a feeling of déjà vu when on a snowy Christmas Eve in the nations capital, terrorists seize a major international airport, holding thousands of holiday travelers hostage. Renegade military commandos led by a murderous rogue officer (William Sadler) plot to rescue a drug lord from justice and are prepared for every contingency except one: McClanes smart-mouthed heroics.”

A character in Scream 2 argues, ironically, that sequels are by definition inferior products. I do not believe that to be the case. Many sequels surpass their originals in part because they do not have to waste so much exposition time. However I will grant you that most sequels are inferior to their originals.

Unfortunately this is guilty confession time. I saw Die Hard 2 and liked it better than Die Hard. Die Hard 2 is by no means a better film but I saw Die Hard 2 under the ideal circumstances (a theater) and Die Hard on VHS in a room with a bunch of my friends chatting. So clearly environment was a factor. It was only much later that I realized how wonderful Die Hard was.

Renny Harlin takes over the directing reins from John McTiernan. His first big film (his previous film was Nightmare on Elm Street 4) is chock full of action and wonderful setpieces obviously inspired by the Hong Kong films of John Woo.

Die Hard 2 is based on the novel 58 Minutes by Walter Wager with the events altered to fit and, in some cases, shoehorn in the Die Hard characters. The screenplay was written by Steven E. De Souza and Doug Richardson. The script and events are exciting but quite a bit more over the top than Die Hard. Not having read 58 Minutes, I am unable to tell if that is the author or the screenwriters.

Bruce Willis reprises his role as wisecracking cop John McClane. Die Hard made Willis an action star and he would reprise this role twice more. He manages the fine line of being witty while performing daring feats of fighting and marksmanship.

Unfortunately they stretch incredulity by not only having Holly McClane (Bonnie Bedelia) in one of the airplanes circling Dulles but also having Richard Thornburg (William Atherton) on the same plane. My eyes did roll when John McClane needs to get help (again) from Sgt. Powell (Reginald VelJohnson).

Since our villains were unlikely to return for a second film, we have William Sadler as Colonel Stuart and, in a brief role, Franco Nero as General Ramon Esperanza.

Dennis Franz essentially plays a cross between his cop in Hill Street Blues and his cop in NYPD Blue but he is always fun to watch. John Amos rounds out the cast as Major Grant.

I heartily recommend Die Hard 2 for Bruce Willis as John McClane and some wonderful over-the-top action. It is definitely not the classic that Die Hard was, in part because it trod the same ground and in part because Alan Rickman was incredible in Die Hard.

Trivia: There is a great scene in one of the trailers for Die Hard 2 that is not in the movie. John McClane is crawling around some ducts with a light and mutters “This is how I spent last Christmas”. There is a somewhat sim ilar line used in a different place in the movie.

People Watch: Wow a veritable smorgasbord of later known actors in small parts. Colm Meaney (Chief OBrien on Star Trek TNG & DS9) is the pilot of the Windsor plane. Robert Patrick (Terminator in T2) plays OReilly. John Leguizamo (Sid in the Ice Age movies) plays Burke. Last but not least yes that is Senator Fred Thompson lending gravitas to the role of troubled airport controller Trudeau.

Lazy Weekend Musings – George & The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

Well after months of drooling over George (the couch above), we finally broke down this weekend and bought it/him for our movie room (aka the room formerly known as the living room).

The console compartment (under my left arm) is roomy enough for all the remotes and a few movies and I love the cupholders. The double seats are very comfortable and recline (though I instantly fall asleep when I do that).

Unfortunately, in spite of looking at and measuring George in the shop, we failed to realize just how much room it takes up. This really does mean that the living room is specifically a movie room.

We also painted the room a deep shade of purple (which looks blue in the photo for some reason) that is wonderfully dark with the lights out. And by we – I mean Rufus, though everyone pitched in. In the can the paint looked Barney purple and we were quite afraid until it dried.

I now finally have my home theater room though it will continue to evolve. Not shown in the picture is that the A/C blows right on me while I sit in front of the big screen. Woohoo!

Our younger daughter also took advantage of the painting party to paint her room a bright yellow.

Happy 4th of July! We just finished watching Independence Day to celebrate the holiday and room. :)

Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus – Shark week

With this being 4th of July week and all the tar balls from the BP spill scaring people away from the beaches, I thought I would spend the week covering other reasons to scare you away from the beaches. This is Shark week. Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus is currently available on instant Netflix.

AVOID: Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus (2009) – Rated R for some language.

“After a series of mysterious disasters occurs in the Pacific, from the disappearance of a plane to the destruction of an oil rig, a group of scientists discovers that a secret military mission has unearthed a prehistoric shark and a giant octopus. When the government learns of the existence of the menacing beasts, the team of scientists is tasked with formulating a plan to destroy the phenomenal creatures. Lorenzo Lamas and Deborah Gibson star.”

“Listen screw these environmentalists. When I give the order, shoot to kill.”

Well each film during Shark week upped the ante. I started with the classic Jaws. Jaws 2 gave us a bigger body count. Jaws 3 gave us a larger shark. Jaws 4 gave us a shark after revenge! I would have loved to end this week with Deep Blue Sea (super intelligent sharks). Sadly it is not available on instant Netflix.

Instead I up the ante with Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus. This is presumably the limit until we get space sharks that swallow planets. When the first words that appear on screen are “The Asylum Presents”, discerning watchers turn off the TV (alternately they run screaming from the theater).

If you have watched a movie on Syfy (ugh) that you thought had a decent B premise and it turned out that it was so awful as to be unwatchable, the chances are that it was made by The Asylum. Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus – dumbed down title, fun idea.

The film does begin with some lovely tracking shots over icy mountains and stock sea shots that are clearly taken somewhere much more tropical. We then see Emma (Deborah Gibson aka Debbie Gibson) piloting a minisub. Her nails are uncolored when we see her but when her hands are in closeup they are covered in black nail polish.

So two goofy errors in as many minutes. Also the Alaskan glaciers look wonderful but apparently Asylum did not want to spring for stock shots of ice calving so they stick in a terrible CGI scene of it. Bleh!

At what point Emma (Debbie) asks, “What did I miss?” to which an assistant replies “any kind of career advancement”. Later Lorenzo Lamas also gets to poke fun at the pop career of Debbie Gibson. These bright spots illuminate an otherwise deeply stupid script.

Writer/director Jack Perez must have realized how bad his film was as both his directorial and script credits are listed as “Ace Hannah”. This does not excuse such incredibly lazy plotting that scenes happen without rhyme, reason or even relation to other scenes.

The most hysterical scene occurs at the 18 minute mark when Megalodon (Mega Shark for those who prefer things dumbed down) takes out an airliner in midflight. It is pretty funny but seriously why? Sharks can jump out of the water and I can rationalize Megalodon leaping farther out of the water than a shark but why is the airliner flying that low to the ocean?

Anyway the laughable leaps in logic naturally get worse as the film progresses. The egregious error rate remains more of a constant but they pile up as the literacy of the script plumbs the depths. Just as the scenes often have no relation to each other, many of the lines of dialogue do not seem to relate to each other.

The acting is terrible but it would be hard to act well given the awfulness of the script. I am not sure what actors it would take to make this travesty watchable.

Hint to Asylum: since most of your films take place in the modern era and many involve armed people, try investing in a few real guns and dispose of the plastic $1.98 props.

In spite of the dreadful dialogue, plotting, sets, and acting, this still could have been fun if some love had been lavished on the special effects. Sadly while Ray Harryhausen would work over a year just on the special effects for many of his films, the CGI here looks like it was the first pass done in a few hours.

Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus is horrendously bad but not the enjoyable kind of bad. Avoid!

People Watch: In the tradition of far better directors, Jack Perez cameos as an Oil Rig Supervisor.


Jaws: The Revenge – Shark week

With this being 4th of July week and all the tar balls from the BP spill scaring people away from the beaches, I thought I would spend the week covering other reasons to scare you away from the beaches. This is Shark week. Jaws: The Revenge aka Jaws 4 is currently available on instant Netflix.

AVOID: Jaws: The Revenge (1987) – Rated PG-13.

“After another deadly shark attack, Ellen Brody (Lorraine Gary) decides she has had enough of New Englands Amity Island and moves to the Caribbean to join her son, Michael (Lance Guest), and his family. But a great white shark has followed her there, hungry for more lives. Michael Caine, Karen Young and Mario Van Peebles co-star; Joseph Sargent directs this third sequel to Steven Spielbergs original Jaws.”

“Dad died of a heart attack!” – “No. He died from fear. The fear of it killed him.”

Minor Spoilers: There really is no good way to describe Jaws the Revenge without revealing some of what happened in the previous installments.

Okay let me sum up for a moment here while being as spoiler-free as I can. In Jaws, a giant great white (~25 feet) shark attacks the residents of Amity Island including Sheriff Brody and kids Sean and Mike. In Jaws 2, a giant great white (~25 feet) shark attacks the residents of Amity Island including Sheriff Brody and kids Sean and Mike.

This causes Sean to wisely move to a landlocked state even though Mike apparently emerges brain-damaged from the two separate ordeals and works at a water park in Florida. Sean, suffering temporary insanity, visits Mike and the pair (and the park) are promptly attacked by *surprise* a great white shark (~35 feet this time).

Surviving this too Sean learns the incorrect lesson that a shark can attack anywhere (even though none attacked him while he was landlocked) and moves back to take up the job of Sheriff of Amity Island. Mike sensibly moves to the landlocked Bahamas where one could not possibly encounter a shark – oh wait!

Apparently our latest shark finally uncovers DNA evidence that his family was basically murdered by the Brody family. This is the only reason I can figure for the decades long delay for revenge. This evidence causes our shark to lay a trap for and kill Sean (not really a spoiler – it is the opening scene). It apparently knew when he would be the only one on duty. No I am not kidding.

Ellen Brody (Lorraine Gary), mother to Mike and Sean, vows never to go near water again and moves to the Bahamas with Mike. What? She then begins to sense that the new shark caught a later flight and is now in the Bahamas. Of course she does not tell anyone because then they would think she was crazy.

Meanwhile Mike who obviously is insane (runs in the family?) survives an attack by a barracuda oops I mean a great white shark and, not wanting to worry his mother, says nothing about it.

Lorraine Gary is a good actress but did not get much movie work. It is perhaps fitting then that her final performance (to date anyway) was the only movie in which she received top-billing. Not counting flashbacks, she is the only one to appear in three of the Jaws movies.

The characters of Mike and Sean Brody appear in all four movies but are played by several actors each. Lance Guest becomes the fourth actor to play Mike Brody. I feel like saying he is okay but he is no Dennis Quaid (Mike #3).

For my wife Jaws the Revenge was proof of her adage that Michael Caine will do anything. He used to be pretty indiscriminate about his role choices but lately he has hooked up with Christopher Nolan (one of my favorite directors) for all of his pictures and did a superb star turn in Harry Brown.

Here Caine plays island pilot Hoagie Newcombe as somewhat of a rogue. This allows him to mug his way through the film though he is quite watchable as always.In a bit of poetic punishment, Caine could not accept his Hannah and Her Two Sisters Oscar because he was busy filming this drek.

When asked about this blot on his career, he stated “I have never seen it, but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific.”

Mario Van Peebles rounds out our lead cast as Jake, partner to Mike and perhaps a bit more sane since he had not decided to work in the ocean after having been attacked by four previous great white sharks.

This travesty was written by Michael de Guzman. Apparently Carl Gottlieb must have said I can write a story about a shark attacking a water park but a shark waiting decades to take personal revenge – well that is just silly.

Here is a hint: if you are asked to write the fourth film in a franchise then perhaps you should watch the first three films so you do not end up contradicting them.

This film is so unbelievably bad that it is very enjoyable for the cheese. However that is not a valid reason to recommend this. In fact you should avoid this. But it is hysterically funny how many leaps in logic you have to make for this to resemble any kind of sense.

Do not even get me started on how a shark can roar. The head of my younger daughter would have exploded if she saw that scene.

Trivia: The older unidentified woman who is in the Brody living room is Mrs. Kintner (Lee Fierro), whose son Alex was a victim in Jaws.

People Watch: Melvin Van Peebles, father of Mario, appears here as Mr. Witherspoon.